How To Network Differently

Let’s be honest: traditional networking events often feel like a gladiator arena for business cards.

You walk in, armed with your elevator pitch and a smile that says, “I’m approachable, but please don’t sell me insurance.”

You leave with a stack of cards, a vague memory of someone’s fintech startup, and the sinking feeling you just survived a polite battle of ‘sell or be sold.’ 😅

But what if there’s a better way to build meaningful connections…one that doesn’t involve awkward badge glances, forced laughter, or pretending you love canapés?

Let’s look into How To Network Differently!

Picture this: you’re at a salsa class. The music is lively, your partner is a stranger, yet within minutes you’re holding hands, moving in sync, and (miracle of miracles) laughing together.

No one’s pitching. No one’s defending. You’re just two humans, sharing a moment and possibly discovering you both have two left feet. 😂

Research shows that physical proximity and shared activities lower social barriers and foster trust.

When we engage in activities that require cooperation and a bit of vulnerability (like dancing, team sports, or even a group escape room) our brains release oxytocin, the ‘bonding hormone,’ making us more open to genuine conversation. 🧠💞

At typical networking events, everyone has an agenda:

• Sellers are on the offensive.
• Buyers are on the defensive.
• Everyone’s guard is up, and meaningful connection is rare.

It’s like speed dating, except everyone’s secretly hoping you’ll buy their software solution. 🤐

Here’s the most important part: Build genuine friendships first, then…if it feels right – network!

This isn’t a clever workaround to sneak in a sales pitch later. The goal isn’t to collect friends like Pokémon cards for future business conquests.

It’s about real connection, not transactional relationships.

Why? Because when you focus on authentic friendship, you create a foundation of trust and mutual respect.

If, down the road, it makes sense to talk business, great. If not, you’ve still gained a friend…and that’s a win in itself. 🎉

‘You shouldn’t do this for the sole purpose of selling later!’

If your only motivation is future sales, people will sense it, and the connection won’t feel genuine.

In fact, research on social capital and trust in professional relationships, shows that authenticity is the real currency of influence and opportunity.

So, next time you’re tempted to lead with your business card, remember: the most valuable network is built on real friendships, not hidden agendas.

The sales, referrals, and partnerships that follow are simply a bonus. 🎁

People do business with those they like and trust. And trust is built through shared experiences, not sales pitches.

• When you connect with someone in a non-commercial setting (say, over salsa, tennis, or volunteering), you’re networking your character, not your services.
• The pressure to ‘sell’ evaporates, replaced by authentic conversation and mutual respect.

Harvard Business Review confirms this: “likability and trustworthiness are the foundation of lasting professional relationships” (Casciaro, Gino, & Kouchaki, 2016).

Let’s be real: not every new friend will become a client. But here’s the beauty, you’ve gained a friend, not just a lead.

Friends can become advocates, connectors, or simply great company at the next brunch. 🥂

Research in social capital shows that diverse, genuine relationships are the true currency of opportunity—far more valuable than a stack of cold business cards.

So, you’ve made a friend at salsa class. Now what? Here are some non-cringey follow-up strategies:

• Send a friendly, personalised message:
  “Hey, I had a blast at salsa—thanks for not stepping on my toes (too much)! 😂”
• Share something of value:
  An article, a playlist, or an invite to another event. 🎵📚
• Suggest a casual meet-up:
  Coffee, another class, or a group activity. ☕
• Celebrate their wins:
  “Congrats on finishing that 5K!” (Even if you’re still recovering from the warm-up.) 🏅
• Check in periodically:
  No agenda, just genuine interest.

• “What got you into (activity)?”
• “Tried any other hobbies lately?”

• Be authentic: People can spot a phony faster than you can say “synergy.”
• Offer help without expectation: Karma (and science) says it pays off.
• Respect boundaries: Not everyone wants to talk business. Sometimes, it’s just about the joy of the dance.

Ditch the boardroom for the ballroom!

Build connections where guards are down, character shines, and the only thing you’re selling is your authentic self.

Not everyone will become a client, but you’ll gain friends, advocates, and a network that’s built to last (and maybe even some killer salsa moves). 💃🕺

…And if all else fails, at least you’ll have a great story about that time you tried salsa and only mildly embarrassed yourself.

Now that’s what I call a successful networking event. 😄

Ready to trade business cards for dance cards? Let’s connect…no sales pitch required. 🎉